We've seen Detroit transform from the punch line to bottom-feeding Jay Leno and Stephen Colbert jokes to the Big National Story in just a few years. We've seen a former mayor sentenced to nearly three decades in prison, seen the city's infrastructure become even more completely unraveled, and watched the filing of the largest municipal bankruptcy in the country's history. We figured, with the number of recent books and documentaries about Detroit that have come out, it was an ideal time to unleash a full-blown Hollywood blockbuster about the city's trials and tribulations —Detroit: The Movie. (!) Can you see it? Robert Duvall could star as Hazen Pingree, the movie's omniscient narrator. Steve Buscemi is probably the only actor fit to take up the squirrelly persona of Gov. Rick Snyder. Idris Elba could handle the duties of Kevyn Orr. Dave Bing would be portrayed by ... actually, don't worry, no one ever saw much of Dave Bing.