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Jeffrey Morgan's Media Blackout

Nobody moves, nobody gets Jeffrey Morgan’s Media Blackout #139!

Brian Azzarello & Eduardo Risso & Patricia Mulvihill100 Bullets, Volume 11 (Vertigo) :: The greatest full-color crime comic ever is back with a gritty new 200-page collection that’s stuffed full of unbridled menace and unrepentant mayhem. If you haven’t experienced this elegantly seedy modern masterpiece of rampant recidivism yet, then it’s definitely time to get your hands wet because 100 Bullets is the textbook definition of what a contemporary crime comic should be. So, don’t be a lollygagging sap waiting for someone to make it into a flick, go out and buy it now. It’ll be the best 16 bucks you spend this week.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Ted NugentLove Grenade (Eagle Rock) :: If you missed Ted’s last couple of albums, don’t worry ‘cause you didn’t miss much. Both Spirit of the Wild and Craveman were half-assed instant delete bin efforts that feebly marked musical time before a bored Ted rightly retired from the studio to hunt and star in his own ferality TV show.

But five years later, a refreshed Ted is back with his best start-to-finish solo album since he recorded Ted Nugent over 30 years ago. It’s so good that his 40th anniversary remake of "Journey to the Center of the Mind" is actually the album’s weakest track. In fact, the only way Ted could’ve improved Love Grenade is if he’d hired Derek St. Holmes to sing half the songs.

Sure, the record’s one long lascivious leer, but don’t ask Ted to return to the days when he used to write socially conscious songs like "Pony Express." I did once and Ted hauled off and slugged me in the shoulder.

Just make sure that the copy you buy has the real sizzling platter on the front. That’d be the album cover with the photo of a naked woman. With her wrists tied behind her back. Doubled over and kneeling on a large cooking platter. Garnished with vegetables. With a hand grenade shoved in her mouth.

You can’t Ms. it.

It’s been real!

Jeffrey Morgan is a freelance writer. Send comments to letters@metrotimes.com

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