Music » Spun


Is anything more terrifying than Jimmy Swaggert?




Jimmy Swaggart
The Plague (1967)

The Summer of the Love will not be seen this evening so we can bring you the following tele-castigation. ...

Why do I love Jimmy Swaggart? Well, neighbor, let me count the ways, all of which are in "profundity" and "abundance" on this 33 revelations-per-minute sermonette. First off, I love the way he overheats like a gas-guzzling LeSabre whenever he expounds on all things evil. I love the way he takes far more breath than he needs for the seven or so words he spouts before taking another ill-timed inhalation. I love the way he has mounted a one-man campaign to keep the word "dastardly" in modern usage. I love how the televangelist who most conspicuously choked in his battle with Satan browbeats a youth group in Springfield, Ill., for wanting to get some teenage kicks. And, of course, I love the way he keeps name-dropping his no-good cousin Jerry Lee Lewis into every one of his turntable preach-outs, forever linking Jerry Lee's ying to Swaggart's sanctimonious yang. Ever get the feeling in real life the Killer avoids Jimmy like ... the Plague? —Serene Dominic


When I sing along with
Waka Flocka Flame I feel like a black
dragon soaring through the wind
blowing fire on people's
houses and stealing their food.

I want to hear a
song that sounds like raindrops
a song that looks like glittering water
a song that tastes like spring
a song that makes me
feel like an angel with wings.

—Willie Antonio James Jr., 6th Grade, InsideOut Literary Arts, Golightly Education Center


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