When we saw our sister publication Cleveland Scene tweet out that DG might get a little help from Warren Buffett to buy Yahoo, we were like, yeah, sounds about right.
While we were certain a chain of hot yoga studios was next up for Detroit's unofficial overlord baron of progress and opportunity, setting his sights on the red-haired stepchild of media companies makes way more sense. Remember this?
Times have changed and nobody has a Yahoo account anymore (except that one weird aunt you have), so the struggling firm is looking to sell its internet biz to the highest bidder and so far, Verizon and some other places that buy shit have marked the box 'yes, interested.'
Buffett told CNBC, "I'm an enormous admirer of Dan and what he has accomplished in Quicken Loans."
"Yahoo is not the type of thing I'd ever be an equity partner in. I don't know the business and wouldn't know how to evaluate it, but if Dan needed financing, with proper terms and protections, we would be a possible financing help."
Translation: I'm gonna give him some money and he better not squander it. But even if he does, who cares, I'm rich as fuck.
According to the CNBC report, the two billionaires have been "close friends" since 2012, when Gilbert joined the Giving Pledge, something created by Buffett and Bill Gates to encourage billionaires to give away at least half of their wealth. The key word in that description is "encourage" — those who sign the pledge aren't legally obligated to do a damn thing, and surprise(!), many of them don't.
But hey, it's the thought that counts, right?
Anyway, here's audio of what D. Gilbz will be saying if the deal goes through.