Of course, we're talking about Davey Pageviews aka Barstool Sports co-founder David Portnoy. The controversial bro-culture site, which launched in 2003 as a humble sports blog, is now a $450 million media company. Portnoy and co. even recently settled a lawsuit with the National Labor Relations Board after he posted anti-union tweets, threatening to fire any employees “on the spot” if they messaged a Barstool Sports Union Twitter account, which turned out to be a fake account created by the company to identify workers interested in unionizing.
Anyway, back to pizza, which is arguably the least insufferable Barstool Sports offering. As part of his popular “One Bite Pizza Review” video series — where he just, like, eats pizza from pizzerias across the globe, like Chuck E. Cheese's, Costco, and Sbarro and arbitrarily rates it — Portnoy ordered up some frozen pie from 2012 winner of World's Best Pizza, Detroit Style Pizza Co.
Due to coronavirus-related quarantine, Portnoy has shifted the show's format from taste-testing ready-to-eat slices out in public to reviewing frozen pizzas by popular brands, as well as mom and pop shops offering frozen pie delivery.
In a review posted Tuesday, Portnoy apparently cannot get enough of the crispy deep-dish Detroit style slice, going as far as to rank it an 8.5, just .3 below his favorite One Bite Pizza to date — Zupaardi's Apizza in New Haven, Connecticut.
“I hate the name of the company, but it's good,” he says. “Like very good.”
He also cannot resist unwrapping his bandaged finger to reveal a grossly infected wound, which forced him to enjoy the Detroit Style Pizza Co. slice one-handed in what he calls “one of the greatest pizza performances of all time.”
“I don't know. Is this frozen pizza? I feel like I'm not eating frozen pizza,” he says. “I feel like I'm getting fucking mindfucked right now.”
You can watch the review below.
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